For the past year, I've been writing some crazy story every night for my kids. Now, as part of home isolation, I thought it would be cool to put a few of them online.
I asked our ten-year-old Zuzanka, who loves to draw and paint, if she would be willing to help with the illustrations, so we're digging out the first fairy tale from the "Covid" series. I hope you'll like it and maybe even make you laugh during this time.
Once upon a time there was a little girl named Zuzanka. She lived in a small house with her father, mother and her little brother Jiříček. Every morning her parents got up to go to work and her mother took Zuzanka to school and little Jiříček to kindergarten. In the afternoon, first-grader Zuzanka would proudly return home alone and take Jiříček home with her, where they would play school together all afternoon and wait for their parents to return.
Mom gave the children big snacks every morning, but Zuzana was still hungry. Most of all, she looked forward to her mom coming home from work and cooking dinner all day.
Mom, mom, what's for dinner! Suzanne called every time her mom's key rattled in the lock.
"Let me breathe," Mom laughed, shooing away Zuzanka, who was fiercely attacking all the shopping bags.
One afternoon, when Susanna couldn't find anything in the fridge and had rummaged through all of her mother's secret hiding places in the pantry, she started thinking hard about what she wanted. She wasn't hungry, she was just being chased by her sweet tooth. Susanna often and happily played chase with her, but she never lasted very long and the sweet tooth always caught her in the end. And that was the problem.
Zuzanka twisted the ends of her skirt, nibbled on her T-shirt, but nothing helped. The glutton was particularly cunning that day and crawled into all corners of her stomach and nibbled on her behind the ears. So Zuzanka couldn't stand it anymore and bit off a piece of Jiříček - just a small piece so that her parents wouldn't notice. Jiříček screamed for a while, but Zuzanka lent him some glowing plasticine that glows in the dark and there was peace.
In the evening, Zuzanka was anxious at dinner to see if anyone would notice anything, but Dad told her what was going on at work, and Mom focused on cooking.
The next day after school, Zuzanka lent her brother some modeling clay and when he wasn't looking, she chewed on it again, but this time a big piece.
In the evening, Dad wrung his hands – Mom, what are you cooking for dinner, one of our children is growing like water, but the other one is probably evaporating. And he closed the window to prevent further evaporation.
Jiříček was about to open his mouth to say something, but Zuzanka kicked him under the table and made a scary face at him. So he preferred to remain silent.
The next day, Zuzanka couldn't wait to get home from school. She was happy that she got over it and, as they say, the appetite grows with food. As soon as she got home, she barely opened the door, threw her bag in the corner and, while still at the shoe rack, threw herself hungrily at her brother. He didn't even have time to beep and before he knew it, he was all over Zuzanka's belly. Only Jiříček's shoelaces were left lying on the floor.
Zuzanka wanted to get up and go to her room, but she couldn't. Her belly was so swollen that she couldn't even move. And to top it all off, her brother was fidgeting terribly. She tried to get up a few more times, but then she just sat there leaning against the shoe rack and started whining. She had taken a bigger bite than she could handle.
Illustration by Zuzka Tománková – 10 years
When her mother came home from work in the afternoon, she found it strange that Zuzanka didn't shout what was for dinner and run to her. And then she saw her. Zuzanka was sitting under the shoe rack with a bloated belly and just rolling her eyes.
What happened?! Mom called worriedly and asked where was Jiříček?
I ate it – by mistake. Zuzanka spat, but she knew it would be bad.
I'll give it to you by mistake! What stupid things have you been doing again! Mom clapped her hands and started to get a little hysterical. She took the phone and dialed Dad's number.
So imagine, Dad, what our girl did. Don't you know? She ate Jiříček. Well, of course, the whole thing – only the shoelaces were left. Okay, come home as soon as possible. She hung up the phone and looked angrily at Zuzanka.
George! Dad knocked on Susan's stomach when he arrived home. Are you there?
"Stop that babbling, Jiříček, I can't understand you," said his mother sternly.
What? That you like it there and don't want to leave? Even Dad was losing his mind.
Threats and pleas for chocolate didn't help - Jiříček simply didn't want to eat. It was warm there and no one was bothering him at all.
"What are we going to do? Neither of us can go to school like this," Dad scratched his chin.
"It's because of the stupid things you do together," Mom was starting to turn her anger against Dad.
Don't worry, mom, I'll call the center - maybe they have some experience with this.
It didn't take long for an ambulance to stop by the house and a doctor got out. So who's sick here? He definitely stepped into the hallway.
But here our Zuzanka ate her brother and now she doesn't want to go out - dad looked desperately at the doctor.
Well, that's nice – that's the third case today, Dad – the doctor looked at the parents. I don't know where these children go for that. And he took a flat stick and looked into Zuzana's throat.
I think, doctor, that they get it from the internet – there's all sorts of nonsense there and the children then repeat it accordingly.
Well, that could be true, mom, the doctor thought. So what's wrong with you, you don't want to go out, they say - the doctor called Zuzana's neck.
Look, I'd have to either cut open this Zuzana's stomach or give her a laxative and you wouldn't like that at all. Either way, you'll have to go out - it wouldn't work that way and Zuzana will surely promise never to bother you again, right? Zuzana just nodded her head quickly, as if it was a given.
And so Jiříček finally climbed out and the doctor could go see other patients. From then on, Zuzanka began to treat Jiříček like an older, sensible sister, she was responsible and never bit him again.
And there's only one thing that comes out of this. For parents, don't leave their refrigerators empty, and for children, never eat their siblings. And if they can't help it, at least hide their shoelaces.
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